He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
