Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize