but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
