i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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