Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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