College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Randomize
