Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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