Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize