You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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