No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize