Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
