just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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