He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
