absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Randomize
