dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
