Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Also, beer. Big fan.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Randomize