Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
