with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
