My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
