PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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