if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Randomize
