Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
