careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
