Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
