And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
