Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
