I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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