thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize