I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Randomize