hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
