Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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