hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
