your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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