Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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