I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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