i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
