shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
