Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
you inspire me to be a worse person
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
