We need to rekindle our bromance
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
