My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize
