Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
