we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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