Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Randomize
