It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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