it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
