Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Randomize