***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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