Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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