Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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