omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
